You may have heard about the online petition to free Paris Hilton. It's here:
I have decided, for the good of all humanity, to start my own petition:
I hope you will take the time to sign it. If not for me, if not for you, then please, do it for the children!
I think we'll all sleep more easily once the median planetary IQ has been raised by Ms. Hilton's enforced demise.
(read the non-ironic one first. the joke depends upon it)
PS. Ignore the donation nag you get after submitting your vote. And vote frequently! they don't check the email addresses.